Might Feel a Little Tight

This is not a blog on my pants. Although it could be. Because as much as I try to remember I sometimes stick my pants in the dryer. The tightness has nothing to do with my eating habits and everything to do with my dryer.

But like I said, it is not a blog about that. I have had a couple of conversations with my two boys in the past week or so on what does or doesn't seem fair. Why one of them gets to do something the other one does not or why sometimes Braxton and I have to say "no" to something they want to do. Something that all of their other friends are doing, listening to, or watching.

The other day I explained something to both of them. And for the sake of me having to repeat it to them again. and again. and again, (because sometimes they don't hear me when I'm talking, I know...shocker) I decided to blog about it and then next time I can just send them to read this. Then we can count this towards their reading log. Killing two birds with one stone. I'm good like that.

Our goal as parents is to launch our kids. Braxton is amazing at this and says we are counting backwards, down from 18 years. At 18 we want to launch them like an arrow. We want them to soar far and high. We want them to have a solid grounding in faith, love and experience so that they will be able to be all that God has created them to be. And we are launching arrows, not boomerangs....

So this is what I said to the boys. You are at different stages in this process. I asked them what does it look like when a archer is about to shoot an arrow. From the beginning to the end. At the beginning he is setting it right in the groove, then he gets it steady on his hand and starts to pull back. The closer to launch time the tighter it gets in the bow. And right before he lets go it is at its tightest point.

So for Emma Sanders it is getting her steady at age 4. Teaching her how to respond in love and respect. How to treat others, how to realize that as much as she wants it to, this world does not revolve around her.

For Bennett at age 8 it is setting him straight in the bow, teaching him how to be responsible. That being a servant we do things for others without being asked. That we recognize our decisions have consequences and most of the time those consequences effect other people just as much ourselves. And it feels a little tighter for him sometimes that it does on Emma. But there are also things that he can do that she does not get to do yet.

And for Preston it feels even a little tighter. At age 13 we are about 4.5 years from the soaring off. And so sometimes with freedom comes great responsibility and that feels a little like pressure. Learning how to navigate that well now will be of great benefit in the long run. That as his daddy says, popularity does not always mean friendship. That athletic ability, academic achievement are great but we humble ourselves each day by remembering where those gifts came from. That becoming a man of honor and character far outweigh fast decisions that may just feel good for a moment. So it does feel tight yes, but you get more freedoms than Bennett and Emma Sanders and even when we have to say no we also get to say yes to you more.

And so we are in the launching process. And yes it sometimes might feel a little tight. But tight is good. Tight is best for you to soar.

All in the Response

Before Preston could even say a complete sentence or walk well he could dribble a basketball. I have video to prove it. Now I can't show you that video because it is on VHS but someday when I get them converted to DVD I will show ESPN when they interview me before his NBA draft. Just kidding. I mean they will probably want the videos before then. All joking aside he really has loved basketball from the beginning.

During one of Preston's games a mistake was made in the official's book and Preston was given one of his teammates fouls. This caused him to foul out of the game. He was upset but handled himself very well. The neat thing was that earlier in the week we had talked about how it is not what happens to you that defines your character but how you respond to it. So after the game I told him how proud I was at how he responded to the situation.

Bennett loves it just as much. They both play with incredible excitement for the game. Over our Christmas break both of their teams have been in tournaments. So we have spent a lot of time in a gym. Bennett made the all tournament team. You could not have wiped the grin off of his face.

So fun. We are proud of both of them. They both are improving and learning. God has given them both such gifts and abilities and our prayer is that they use them for His glory and honor.

Their sister has gifts and abilities as well, her's just range more on the sassy, adorable, you know you want to be like me gifts or whatever you might call those. For example while we were at one of the basketball games this little boy walked up and said hi to Miss Priss, I mean Emma Sanders. Her response? She rolled her eyes. I quickly said, Emma Sanders that is so rude, he is just saying hi and wants to play with you. Now how should you respond? She then without hesitation looked at me completely serious and said, "Mom, I just rolled my eyes because I was chewing ice."  We have a lot of work to do...a lot of work.

4 Years in the Making

Emma Sanders Brady turned four on November 20, 2011. Her school does a great job of celebrating girls and their life and during the chapel program on Thursday she got to go up front and receive her birthday pencils. Two pencils, one blue, one white. Nothing special about them to the average human but to a St. Mary's girl they are magical. And we loved watching Emma light up with all the joy in the world to go tell the student body how old she was and to receive her pencils.

We had her birthday party on Friday night at Little Gym. A perfect place for a girl with more energy in her little finger than I have in my whole body. She loved it.

Emma Sanders you are a joy to our family. You have been such a gift to us. You are absolutely hilarious and we never know what is going to come out of your mouth. You are kind, curious, spunky and very smart. You like to play with your dolls and do their hair. You actually like to do everyone's hair, including your cousin Wyatt. Your smile can light up a room and your laughter is contagious. My favorite thing you say lately is when we laugh at something you do you say, "I know, right?"

We are grateful that the Lord chose us as your parents. We pray everyday that you will know the Lord's love and that you will follow with passion and zeal his plan for your life.

Not His Home

Mid October I chaperoned a field trip with Bennett's class to the zoo. It was a beautiful day and we had a great time learning about all the different animals. The class first started out in a room where a zoo keeper brought out snakes, iguanas, and a rat. She took them around to let the kids see up close and they could even pet them if they wanted. Bennett did not, that's my boy.

After the class we were split into groups and had a list of clues to read and then guess which animal the clues were about. It was really fun and we were even given an itouch to record the boys finding the answer to each clue.

Towards the end of the adventure we found ourselves in the polar bear exhibit, which at the Memphis zoo is incredible. Another mom and I noticed that this one particular bear was doing odd things. He would move towards the wall, slightly bump into it, shake his head, walk backwards about 10 steps and then repeat.

We watched him for a few minutes and then this mom said something that has stuck with me ever since. "This is not his home." She went on to talk about how nice his surroundings are, how well he is taken care of, how much food he gets, how the zoo vaccinates and takes amazing steps towards providing for him but it is still not his home. It is not the wild where he belongs. That maybe his captivity makes him behave strangely.

Last week I served on jury duty and was actually picked for a trial. It was a very interesting week to say the least. I actually enjoyed it and aside from having to juggle kids, carpool, basketball games and a guitar recital would love to do it again. During the week the other jurors and I were asked not to discuss the trial during our breaks. So the conversation turned toward our on personal lives and getting to know one another.

In the midst of those conversations I shared with several of my co-jurors where I live and why I live there. Their initial reaction was some very strange looks. Like, have you lost your mind? Why would you chose to live there? That is crazy.

And so my mind went back to the zoo. And I was reminded that this is not my home. That in 1992 my heart was captivated by Jesus and a love that has never let go and because of that sometimes my behavior seems strange.  And sometimes Braxton and I do what seems crazy in the eyes of the world and we make decisions that seem odd or go against what everyone else might be doing.

There is a reason for our craziness as it may seem. This is not our home.  And our hope and prayer is that our actions and behavior point to the One who has promised us an eternal home with him.

"But our citizenship is in heaven, and from it we await a Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ."
Philippians 3:20

I just wrote that

Bennett and Emma are our musical geniuses in the family. Bennett loves to play the guitar and Emma loves to sing and dance. She picks up on song lyrics pretty quickly and sometimes will even write her own version.

Braxton and I argue over which one of us they got it from. I mean Braxton might be able to sing but I've got Moves like Jagger. Ahem. seriously, I do. Or did at one point in my life when my hips had not been moved to other worlds from child birth. I digress.

On Wednesday nights our family sits down with Operation World, http://www.operationworld.org/ and picks out a country to talk about and to learn more about what is going on there. We then stick a pin in that country on our world map in the playroom and pray for it.

Emma is still and quiet because she is so intent on listening and learning. Or....she knows that if she is still and patient her daddy will let her sing and dance for us afterwards. Kind of her own little version of America's Got Talent. For example the other night she wore a camouflage hat, pj's, and shook a blue and white pom pom while singing her rendition of This is the Day combined with Jesus is Lord. She is a prodigy.

This was practice time in the kitchen before. She wanted to warm up and asked me to tape her so she could watch. It was pre costume and there was a little bit of song change up from her final performance. My favorite part is when she sings, "he lives riiighhtt here" and puts her hand on her throat.

She has also coined the phrase recently "I just wrote that" in our home. Did you catch it in the song? Just in case anyone was wondering, this thing has been copy righted.

For example at lunch the other day she wanted to pray all by herself. She started out singing God our Father then took a hard left into Jesus loves me and ended with thanks for this day and my singing. Not sure she ever even mentioned the food, Nonetheless, at the end she looks up at all of us and says, "Did y'all like that?" Then says, "I just wrote that."

We are going to be rich people, rich. She also likes to cook. So we have got that as a back up plan if the singing/song writing thing doesn't pan out.

Friday night Braxton was out of town and it was just me and the kids. Emma wanted to make cup cakes. Red Velvet cup cakes. Don't ask why. But we did it. We had so much fun and Bennett helped as well. They were actually quite yummy. On Saturday we shared them with some kids in the neighborhood.

If you will look closely Bennett has huge black triangles on his face. Earlier he had ask me if he could paint his face. I said yes and he went upstairs and 10 minutes later I thought I was being visited from one of the band members from Kiss. I think he is getting jealous of his sister's talent and is worried she might one up him on the whole song writing thing, so he is going into costumes. I'm not sure.

Good times. The hits just keep coming at the Brady house. Never a dull moment.

Go Home Whitey and Other Advice from the Hood

About a year before Braxton and I moved into our neighborhood we had dinner with a friend that had moved in about 2 years prior. He was telling us about a time when he was walking down his street and a man called out "go home whitey." We laughed at the irony of the situation as this was our friend's home.  There is great advice given by neighbors here. Some warranted and some not so much.

A year later we found ourselves living in the same neighborhood and about six months later I found myself chasing a much younger and faster 10 year old who had just stolen Preston's scooter. About halfway around the block and completely out of breath, I was telling myself, "go home whitey." Good advice.

We have joked several times about how we should write a book on all the funny stories and things that people could not only enjoy but benefit from by our experience. I think I would title it Gunshots from the Lumber Yard. But that is another story albeit piece of advice for another day.

Definitely part of the book would have pictures. On several occasions we have seen things that you would not believe unless you could see it yourself. I recently told my friend Erin, "we will never be bored here."

For example:

This is a man on a horse. On our street. He lives here. In the middle of the city. The horse lives in his backyard. Our lots are roughly 50 X 150, not bad space for a swing set but maybe not so much for a full grown horse. You can't make this stuff up. I think this man's advice would be, "when gas is expensive, make the best of a bad situation. Buy a horse." No gas for a lawn mower, no gas for a car. I like to call him an economist.

Exhibit #2

Tuesday night as I arrived home from picking Bennett up from football practice this was the scene in our guest bathroom. Apparently Emma Sanders had emptied an entire bottle of her shampoo into the upstairs bathtub. And when a catalyst such as this is added to previously stopped up plumbing, well this is the result. I guess if you are going to have a toilet overflow, bubbles is better than the alternative.

Braxton was in the front yard with a flashlight and a wrench for the better part of an hour. Then because my husband is acutely aware of his strengths and weaknesses, he called a plumber.

Only in our neighborhood can you make enough noise with a plumber's snake to wake the dead at 9:30 at night and no one complains. Around here things are just getting crankin' about that time.

Turns out we were clogged up with close to an entire box of baby wipes. I like to call us multi-taskers. We clogged a toilet, provided free entertainment in the hood, and cleaned a bathroom floor all at the same time.

I think I am already working on my 2nd book, What you can't do in your neighborhood, you can definitely do in mine.

An Eagle, Crusader and a Turkey

An Eagle, crusader and a turkey all walked into a bar. Sounds like the beginning of a bad joke, doesn't it? 

Well the bar is not exactly right. More like all walked into a school.

Yesterday marked the first day of the 2011-2012 school year where all 3 of our children were in school for a full day. They were all excited and I was too. It was time. I love the summer and spending time in our PJ's watching movies, staying up late playing games but I also enjoy the serenity of everyone being in a routine and having a little schedule up in here. 

Preston is 13 and in 7th grade this year at ECS and they are the Eagles. He is proud to be an eagle. This is a new school for him and after being there a week and a half he is doing great. He told me last Friday night that he felt like he had known these guys all his life. Such an answer to prayer. He is playing football and is loving going to a co-ed school. I have not once had to ask him to brush his teeth or put on deodorant.

Each year Braxton gives our kids a word for the school year. We talk about the word throughout the year at dinner or different times. It starts great conversations with them and we are able to talk about how they used their word or how they saw their word in action for that day or week. Braxton does a great job on his blog explaining it http://www.strategicdads.com/blog

Preston's word for this year is example. We want him to be an example to others in his words and actions.

Bennett is 8 and in the 2nd grade this year. He is at PDS and they are the Crusaders. He moved to the upstairs hallway this year which is where his dad is. He is so excited and told Braxton the other day, "dad, I will just be able to drop by your office anytime." I love it, like they are co-workers and he can just pop in his office for coffee or lunch. I'm sure Braxton will have a conversation with him about the frequency of just "dropping in." Bennett is playing flag football this year and loves it. 

Bennett's word for the year is respect. We want him to be respectful to authority and to learn a respect for others as he puts others ahead of himself.

 

Emma is starting school for the first time this year. She is 3 and in Pre K at SMS. They are the Turkeys. She so far loves school. She is only going 3 days a week, and LOVES it. She was hilarious the first day. Emma how was your day? "Mom, it was like 5 minutes and that girl with the orange hair and blue dress pushed me." Emma how did you respond? "I asked her to please not push me again." That was great Emma, did you use your word that daddy gave you, kind? "Yes." "Mom, can I change my word?"

She has now decided she wants to have the word polite. I think we will stick with kind and hopefully by the end of the year she will have grown into it. :)

We are excited about a great new school year. Braxton received a new title at PDS. He is now the Director of the Building Boys Making Men Institute, he will remain as the Chaplain and Bible teacher as well. I am so proud of him. He works really hard and is a great teacher, father and husband. 

An Eagle, Crusader and a Turkey walked into a school. And behind them stood a momma with a tear on her cheek and a smile on her face. It was going to be a good year.